How To Have More Intense Orgasms:

An Easy Guide For Women

Written by: Angela Watson | Updated: April 12th, 2023

Everybody loves a good orgasm. That's the operating term though, good. Despite our best efforts, many of our orgasms are just garden variety and not worth writing home about. But what about those jaw-dropping, knee-trembling orgasms that might even make you go blind for a little bit afterwards? Those are the orgasms dreams are made of, ladies.

Upping your orgasm game is a fairly simple task and the ends more than justify the means. Luckily the tips I'll be giving you on how to get more intense orgasms are hardly difficult to achieve and integrate into your daily life. It's always worth reminding my readers that while physical sensations do play a huge part in orgasm, the brain is the largest erogenous zone in the body. As much as that sounds like a simple platitude, it's true. If you aren't feeling it, well, it's much harder to get that explosive orgasm from the get go.

This list is going to be a mix of both physical ways to help skyrocket your orgasmic pleasure to unforeseen heights as well as ways to exploit the mental mechanisms behind a ferocious orgasm. Let's not waste any more time and get right into the meat of things.

It's A Marathon, Not A Sprint

It's often said that we find what we're looking for when we least expect it. This advice is usually given to people looking for the right job or relationship, but it also applies to the bedroom as well. If you have a singular focus of trying to orgasm as strongly as possible and as quickly as possible, you're doing yourself a disservice.

Like many things in life, a good orgasm is much more about the journey than it is the destination. Don't rush through any parts of your sexual experience just to try and scrape at an orgasm, you'll be left very disappointed. Instead, focus heavily on the entire experience.

Start with a slow and meaningful foreplay session meant to build tension and bring out your most voracious animal instincts before deciding to go any further. Once you're into the bulk of your solo or partnered session, go slow and make sure to hit as many different pleasure points as you can. Finally, as you're reaching the end, tease yourself by keeping yourself right at the edge for as long as you can. Stop entirely if you have to prevent yourself from orgasm. A much stronger orgasm will result if you repeatedly bring yourself right to the brink of orgasm and then stop before finally going over the edge.

Perform Kegels For A Stronger Pelvic Floor

Have you noticed that over time your orgasms have gotten weaker and weaker? As we age our pelvic floor muscles weaken and few women take the time to return them to their previous state.

The pelvic floor muscles are responsible for the contractions felt in your genital area during sex and when they are repeatedly contracted and released a signal is sent to the brain to release endorphins.

You'll be able to have much stronger sensations and a much more powerful orgasm if you keep your pelvic floor muscles in tip-top shape.

Kegels are the easiest way to accomplish this. Simply put, kegels are a workout for your pelvic floor muscles or as I like to call them, "puss-ups." The muscles you contract to stop yourself from urinating mid-stream are your pelvic floor muscles. 

The average kegel workout consists of contracting these muscles for about ten seconds, resting for another ten, and then repeating the process anywhere from 5-10 times total for a single set. Three to five sets should be done on a daily basis to start seeing results. 

If you want to add jumper cables to the process to speed things up a bit, using weighted kegel balls are a great way to get yourself into pelvic shape. There are a bunch of different kegel balls available on the market, here's a list of the best kegel balls I've tried if you want to learn more.

Shake Things Up A Bit

The brain has a nasty habit of becoming acclimatized to anything it goes through on a consistent basis. If you're always bringing yourself to orgasm by having sex or masturbating the same way, your brain will start becoming less and less excited which will result in weaker orgasms.

Put a different spin on things as often as you can, sometimes putting more attention onto the labia & clitoris or at times shifting more towards the G-spot. Be as creative as you can here to make your brain understand that things are not going down the same old way it's become used to. Even using a different hand than you usually do can see results, it's all about novelty. If you need a little bit of help finding your g-spot, I've written a guide to finding your g-spot.

New ways of stroking yourself or toys that are differently shaped work wonders at keeping your sexual encounters as varied and new as possible. A good side effect of this tip is that over time you'll become much more in tune with what your body responds to and how intense that response is.

Apply Lube Liberally

A large majority of the women I speak to don't use lube at all and instead rely entirely on their own natural production of moisture to get them to the O-zone.

That might be effective for some in getting the orgasms they want, but using more lube will make up for the deficits in your natural production as well as get things much more slippery and fun than if you went all natural.

Make sure to go for a lube that is pH neutral and won't contribute to yeast infections and apply it liberally. Lubricate your vagina as well as whatever is going to be coming in contact with it to reduce friction and increase pleasure.

A much wider range of sensations can be felt with the right amount of lube and this will make a difference in your levels of sexual satisfaction. Read my in-depth guide on the best personal lubricants we've used if you want to learn more.

Use Fantasy To Your Advantage

Imagination isn't just for children playing in the woods, adults playing in the bedroom can take advantage of the mind for a much more naughty purpose. Adding psychological stimulation can multiply the physical sensations being felt to really kick things into the next level. 

Allowing yourself to become completely engulfed in fantasy will take you out of your normal mindset full of worries about the day you had or your anxieties which will result in you becoming completely in the moment and caught up in your current sexual play. Fantasy need not only apply to pretending you're having sex with someone else, you can pretend you are in a different time or a different place and lose yourself in the fake, highly erotic world you've created for yourself. If you are fantasizing that your partner is someone else, it's probably best that you keep that to yourself lest you hurt any feelings. 

Take An Orgasm Break

If you constantly masturbate or have sex with the intention of having an orgasm, you may have become desensitized over time since your body is used to climaxing on a frequent basis. Giving things a rest for a period of time to allow yourself to refresh is a great way to increase the amount of pleasure you get from your next orgasm.

The brain will begin to cry out for an orgasm much like how it would cry out for food after you've starved yourself, and the results will speak for themselves when you finally give yourself what your body has been asking for.

Use A Vibrator With Lots Of Settings

A recurring theme here is that novelty and a wide range of sensations will make for a stellar orgasmic experience. If you use vibrators, try and look for one that has as many different intensity levels and vibration patterns as possible.  The different kinds of stimulation will keep building up tension inside of you before you inevitably pop.

Focus On The Clitoris

Few women actually report amazing orgasms from penetrative sex alone, the real key to the female orgasm is found inside the clitoris. It's special tissues are jam packed full of nerve endings that are highly responsible for a gushing orgasm that you'll remember for days afterwards.

Everybody's clitoris varies in sensitivity, so at first go slow and gentle and then start ramping things up. Try out different sensations like moving in a circle or side to side and then use your clitoris to it's full potential. Neglecting the clit is probably one of the biggest mistakes I've seen women make when trying to track down a worthwhile orgasm.


The orgasm of your dreams is well within your grasp if you're willing to put in the proper work. Take as much time as you can to explore your body in private and figure out what makes your engine rev. It should be a fully comprehensive plan from both the mental and physical aspect. Think about what kind of sexual encounters you like and start living those fantasies during your masturbation sessions.

Toys are a great way to figure out what kind of sensations work for you best since they are capable of doing things that our bodies can't and never get tired unless their batteries run out. Orgasms are a great stress reliever and if I could prescribe them I would, but writing this guide is the next best thing.

Enjoy yourselves, girls!

About Angela Watson

I'm a sex therapist by day and a sex blogger by night. I love to crush the taboos surrounding sex toys and help people become more sexually liberated. There's no topic too risqué for me to cover and I hope to educate and inform my readers on all things sex. All things that concern the female anatomy or require a more clinical approach than my husband Don can provide is covered by me. Have any questions? You can contact me via email.

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